Lady Lumps – When curvey becomes plain old fat

For most of my life I have had body image issues. I’ve never been ‘tinny’. I’ve always been bigger then the other girls and until recently I’ve always said I’m fat and always will be. I recently looked at a photo of myself when I was 14 years old and wish I could be that small again, however I know at the time I thought I was a GIANT wearing size 12, and realistically compared to the other girls I was.

Part of the problem has always been this idea of what size is normal. When i was younger if you were above a 10 you were fat, now (at 23) I see that magic number as a 12. I doubt I’ll ever fit in a 12 again, I currently measure 5’10” 38(12D)-33-40 and weigh 88kgs. I vary between (pants) a size 14 and a size 16 depending on the style and brand and (tops) size 12 and size 14. This is one of the big problems, why don’t we have standardized sizes for ladies clothes in Australia? It’s the most depressing feeling to go into a store (in this case ICE) where you have ALWAYS been a medium to find that suppliers have changed and now the large is a little tighter then you’d like. I no longer shop at ICE – I like the clothes but it’s a depressing feeling to be reaching for that large and I just can’t do it.

It doesn’t help that clothing is designed based on this magic figure that a minority of the population has the luck of birth to have. I understand that exercise and diet play a role in your size, but a stubborn fat patch (in my case my thighs) can cause havoc when shopping for clothing. A few years back I worked my darnedest to lose weight. I got down to around 79kg. I felt amazing when standing on the scale – my body tends to like to sit around 90kg without a strict diet and it was a major achievement for me to break that 80kg barrier. I was getting a lot of compliments on my appearance and it was a major boost to my confidence – that is until I went shopping to buy new jeans.

I probably tried on every pair of jeans in the store – nothing fit the way I wanted it to. My thighs were preventing me wearing a size 13. To get past my thighs I was having to try on size 14 and 15 jeans – often leaving a gaping 3 or so inches at the waist band. This meant I had to buy lower riding jeans which make me uncomfortable as my sizable derrière would result in a substantial plumbers crack when sitting or bending (eww). So i gave up on the diet. I couldn’t get into the smaller clothing sizes, and it was in fact making it MORE difficult to find clothing. I allowed myself to return to my slovenly ways and turned back into a whale. I think the 8 months of hard work took only 3 or 4 months to be undone.

Right now I’m trying again, I am aiming to break that 80kg barrier before I get married next October, and I intend to do something about my thighs even if it means I have to resort to liposuction. Regardless of what people say about everyone having a different shape I am not happy with the way I am. I wish those people could try being the different shape – unable to find cloths that fit, I’m sure they wouldn’t be able to keep up the ‘be happy with the way you are’ attitude – especially if they too started hearing remarks like ‘sausage legs’ directed at them.

Signing Off – MCL


5 Responses to “Lady Lumps – When curvey becomes plain old fat”

  1. 1 Harrie
    September 28, 2011 at 11:22 am

    https://www.facebook.com/Youredrobe please come visit! there are plenty of girls like you i want to help find a different version of yourself through fashion!

  2. September 28, 2011 at 1:52 pm

    I know how you feel. I am wanting to lose some weight too. I’ve finally let go of unhealthy standards though. I try on what I want and if it don’t fit I just say to the sales lady “This outfit can’t contain all of my hotness” lol! I just want to work on my body for my own happiness and personal standards of beauty.

    I get sick of sitting down and pulling at my shirt to cover up my lumps, feeling like people are staring and judging me. I want to feel comfortable. Like I could frolic around in a swimsuit and not care what people think. I don’t care about sexiness, unless its Chris who thinks it. At the bar the other night I was getting checked out by this guy while I was dancing and it made me feel really uncomfortable. I’ve been in a relationship for so long I’m not used to being looked my other men!

    I love my gym, haven’t been for a week though. There’s nothing like the feeling of busting out some cardio, doing some leg presses and squats, then lifting some weights. I walk out of the gym feeling invincible and my mood improves drastically for days. I just have to keep it up, its really hard when you’ve got exams/assignments.

    Anyway sorry for writing the essay on your blog. I really hope you reach your goal, and srsly, f*ck the store sizing dramas. Really, what matters is YOU and when you look at yourself in the mirror (naked like I do) and think “Ok, I’m happy”, THAT’S what matters. THAT’S my goal, and it should be your’s too.

  3. 4 cupcake2eater
    December 10, 2011 at 9:20 am

    This is my problem, except I’m the exact opposite, I’m tall but thin with a small waist and long legs that makes it near impossible to find jeans that will fit the right way. You know how long it took me to find a pair of skinny jeans that would not resort in my pants being around my ankles because they were so big. It also wasn’t helping that the sales women suggest a size 00 which looked more killer capri jeans than the actual jeans. And by killer I don’t mean awesome I literally mean they would have killed my legs.

    I think I’m a bit too thin and believe me I have tried changing that for a long time but for some reason my body REFUSES to gain any weight therefore making my pant shopping a near non-extistent thing. I have a friend who I think is as skinny as me and I know a girl who looks like she’s anorexic and I swear I think she might even have a bigger waist than I do!

    The life of a thirteen-year-old, being a teenager can really suck sometimes.

    • December 11, 2011 at 6:36 am

      One thing to look forward to – if you’re 13 now that means over the next few years you should gain some hips! That wont help with high waisted pants, but it means you might be able to find hip huggers that fit you (and really, those ONLY look good on slim girls!).

      My neice is tinny too and makes do with Denim Jeggins instead of jeans – not quite the same I know, but something to try? If you’re handy at sewing at all you could modify a pair of Jeggins to look more like jeans but adding belt loops and pockets.

      One last option to try would be online. Some online stores actually do made to measure – I did a quick google (note I have NOT tried this store!) and this one poped up (decent prices):

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